From the minute I found out I was pregnant, I decided I was already a mom. I celebrated mother’s day while pregnant, I called myself a mom.
I will always justify this, personally because I had to take extra care of myself, for someone else- after all, that is a lot of what being a mother is about. I will write a separate post one day about my pregnancy experience, that is not for this day.
Today, I would like to share with you how my life changed because of one, very special, piece of me.
As you can already tell, I am happy to be a mom. I embraced this change with all my heart and I feel I have taken it in my stride and am going to make the most of it. No matter how happy I am, however, I have found myself pulling my hair out from time to time because it is no simple journey- again, I will write about all those experiences, today is only about how my life has changed.
Planning. I thought I was a planner, until motherhood.
Boy, where do I start. I have always fancied myself a planner, even planning for unexpected events by packing extra clothes or pajama’s in case I have to sleep somewhere or go for an unexpected dinner or book launch. Though my life has not really changed in that regard- I just do everything with my daughter- I now have to plan double- because I do everything with my daughter. I plan everything in advance and may carry an extra entire bag to be sure that Mambo can make it everywhere I can.
Physically, I have to be home.
The few people who know me, know how outgoing I am. I love to NOT be home and would much rather be out and about doing any manner of things. I have a baby now however, and even though I still a do a lot of that with Mambo firmly attached to my hip or back or car seat, I also acknowledge that because she needs to be home to rest more than I do, I have to be home and ensure that it happens. I have a very active child, who barely sleeps and adapts to surroundings as quickly as I do, so thankfully we do not have to be home bodies, but we do have to sleep at home, so we can all be sane. Sanity- soooo important.
Tired? How did I get tired?
I went from never needing sleep to needing sleep all the time because I am no longer in control of my sleep! I am a breastfeeding mom, meaning every time the girl (as we affectionately call her in our home) needs milk, she is looking for one of two things.Left breast, right breast. Our daughter does not sleep for longer than a 2 hour stretch before she needs a top up- enough said. She is also very much a boob girl! I am a functioning, sleep deprived, smiley zombie.
Patience is indeed a real virtue.
I always thought I was patient, our daughter took me to places I did not know existed. I found many times in her early life where I would lose my entire mind, and would have to bring myself back. The more I lost my mind, the more I found I just needed to breathe and get rational, and bring myself back. I am not saying I am the most patient person around, but I know I am definitely more patient than I was a year ago. I also laugh a lot more now when things could potentially get annoying! I am also a lot more patient with people I work with and interact with, my family and friends.
Less time for hangers on.
I prioritize my young family now, over anything else. Need something done after hours? Don’t ask me, I am bonding with my daughter and her daddy- I simply do not have time for anything else, nor do I want to have time for anything else.
I sing. A lot.
Now, I am no Whitney Houston, but I wont lie, I have a song for everything now! Everything. Under the sun. She loves it, she sings along, she is happy, I am happy- the end.
I have always loved hard, I love even harder.
Having Mambo with me is a constant reminder to make the most of the time we have. We do not know how long that is, and all I want for our little girl is happy memories and times and the knowledge that I will never let her be harmed. Because of this, I tend to take the same approach with the people around me who matter- letting them know just how much I appreciate them in my life. I have allowed myself to love without reservation thanks to our little one, and in turn allowed myself to be loved with no strings attached.
Life is a real adventure.
Everyday is an opportunity not only to learn about her, but to learn about myself and my partner too. I have learnt a lot about myself through her, and I am forever grateful for this.
Motherhood is no walk in the park, but you can certainly make it fun and enjoy it- together.